Mmmm...

My mother has a quote she cut out from a newspaper years ago about former Minnesota Vikings wide-receiver, Randy Moss, that says something like "He's like a woman who doesn't cook, doesn't clean, and doesn't like kids, but she's so beautiful, you have to love her anyways." Call me narcissistic, but I like to think of myself in a similar way, if not to justify some degree of social worth despite not cooking, cleaning or innately loving crotch spawn.

Recently, I've found it justifiable that if I wanted it 'ug it up' a little, I could; since I've learned to balance out the scales by taking up baking. "Baking" being a loosely used term here, as most of my baking to date has been of the boxed variety, but hey, it's a step in the right direction. But I have nearly perfected my pink lemonade cupcakes and I did make a pretty delicious checkerboard chocolate and vanilla cake from scratch (after having to Google what 'creaming' was). I've been instructed by Lawberdasher and his family to work on my pie, specifically pumpkin, making skills before Thanksgiving. We'll see about that. I still shudder every time I think about cutting into a pumpkin after having to carve about 40 of them in a day back when I worked at the local zoo.

Really, it's not the baking that's excited me, but rather the decorating portion of it. It hasn't proved too difficult to make a batch of confetti or Devil's food cupcakes, and the best part (for me) is making them pretty. Right now the extent of my skill is learning how to properly use a Wilton #22 tip to make a nice spiral, and I almost have it down perfectly. Top it with some hard colored sugarcane and they look phenomenal. Next, I think I'll score some of those cupcake books and try to work on my icing skills. At least I have decent frosting penmanship. It's all about making it look good.

On that note, I decided to enroll in a Michaels Wilton beginners cake decorating class. You know, it's actually pretty fun. Expensive as hell - but I was told to expect that. And I've done the best I can to 'stick it to the man' by using a 40% off coupon for everything I need (Psst - Michaels honors competitor coupons too! Pull your JoAnn's 40%'er too!), having my mom buy me clown heads at SuperOne for $0.10 and rummaging through Goodwill for pans. That being said. I've got it down. Yesterday was my first class decorating endeavor - the LESSON 2 RAINBOW CAKE. Here's what my finished product looked like. The holy instruction book made it a happy birthday cake (Sean was apparently turning 5) and I couldn't think of anything witty/snarky/mildly offensive to write on it in class, so I figured hell with it, I'm bringing it to work. CLG, Represent.


I rule. *slow fist pump, a'la American Beauty*

And now I can justify asking for the KitchenAid pink stand mixer for Christmas. Score.

Also, I recently decided to start using my Twitter that I created about a year ago. Follow me @dixieesquire. That is all.

Esquire Endorsements.

Just a quick note to say I'm still around, despite not being particulaly regular at blog updating. I've been reading more than writing, as is evidenced by my list of wonderful blogs I follow to the right. While you wait for me to become more interesting, check those out.

Lawyers in Love

Since we went away this last weekend to Daytona to celebrate our 2 year anniversary, I thought I'd blog about my SO, Lawberdasher. Yes, for those of you doing the math and knew my relationship situation exactly 2 years ago, we did celebrate 2 year anniversary about a month early, as we started dating on October 4, 2007. It's been bliss since then.

What is there to say about the guy that I have so much in common with? Life's been good. He's someone who enjoys (well, okay, tolerates) my guilty pleasures, such as Rocky Horror Picture Show and flea markets. He's the only person I've met in my age group who can sing most Meat Loaf songs without coaching beforehand. In fact, we both individually had the conversation with each other that we had thought at some point after a failed relationship that the next person we date needed to know the words to I'd Do Anything for Love to be able to do a duet from day 1. He does, I do, and yes, we did. A match made in heaven? Something like that.

And like I said, it's been bliss since then and we've been inseparable ever since. He's bitter, sarcastic, and full of himself - and an absolute sweetheart. He has, without a doubt, the biggest heart of anyone I've ever known. He can take it, and dish it out, but when it's all said and done, he's my teddy bear. As much as we're the same, we're totally different. I mean, I'm from Minnesota (Minnesota nice!) and he's from New Jersey (fuggiduboutit.) - which at least makes driving with each other unnerving, considering I let about 40 people in front of me and drive 5 miles below the speed limit, and he drives like Dale Earnhart with his middle finger stuck to the window. It's lovely, really. There is never a dull moment in our lives. Well, right now he is playing Goldeneye on N64 with his buddies while I type this, which isn't thrilling for me, but, you know.

That being said, off on a little tangent. I'm in the process of planning his 25th birthday extravaganza; a roast, a la Comedy Central style. With his sarcastic, hilarious nature, which is shared by most of his friends, it's going to be epic. I mean, he's a [soon to be] lawyer from New Jersey. He's begging for jokes just by existing. He's a walking stereotype. I love it. So preparations are being made for speakers, favors and food. Boy, do I wish I could get SassyPie down here to make a cake, I'm sure it would be divine. As it stands, I'm probably going to get a massive sheet cake from Sam's Club and decorate it myself. But more on my baking endeavors in another post.

So here's to you, Beautiful. Thank you for a wonderful 2 years (1 year 11 months) - and may there be many more.

Attorneys aren't athletic.

In a brief loss of rational thought, I decided that it would be a terrific idea for me to sign up for a half-marathon. Well, all rational thought was not lost, as the race I chose to be a part of was the Disney Princess Half Marathon, set for March 7, 2010, and I was clearly drawn into it by the thought of wearing a crown while I ran. Pageant days flashed back and I began doing the ‘elbow, elbow, wrist, wrist’ wave silently in my office. $140 entrance fee, paid! Confirmation e-mail, received! I’m signed up for a 13.1 mile run! I can get a tiara medal!

And then I snapped back into reality. I don’t run. I’m far from athletic. My quads are tighter than a new pair of Manolo Blanik pumps because I’ve been wearing heels and walking at a 45 degree angle for the last 9 years of my life. I am physically unable to do stretches or positions such as downward dog. I go to the gym only as a result of guilt after polishing off a third of a bag of Spicy Nacho Doritos. Oh, Goddess.

Well then, let the training begin! The other associate in our office is far more in shape than I, and currently in a CrossFit program. Thus, he is my trainer. (I’m not entirely sure whether he is aware of this or not.) Since our office is relatively lax, we’ve been running on a (somewhat) daily basis. This has really only served to confirm what I said above – I’m far from athletic. To be honest, both he and I look like we were hit by the lawn care trucks that frequent the island by the time we get back to the office. On the bright side, I was able to complete a mile run at noon in 95 degree Florida sun and heat in under 10 minutes (9:40!) which bodes well for some degree of success in at least completing the marathon. The ‘pace’ before the ‘slow trolley’ comes and picks you up is about a 16 minute mile, so I think I’m in the clear to avoid that. Plus, I can’t be the most out of shape person there, right? ...right?

In an effort to at least gage my success prior to the Disney, I signed up for the Komen 5k Race for the Cure in October as well. See the theme? Pink, crowns, sparkles, etc. If I come up with a glorious enough outfit, I can wear it for both. Running? What’s the big deal about that? The outfit is what’s important.

I’ll be updating frequently about my quest to show that I’m more than just a pretty face behind a desk. That is, unless I collapse after one of our afternoon runs, in which case I’ll be the pretty, albeit sweaty and red, face under the desk. We’ll see.

May it please the Court.

My name, or handle as it may be, is OohLawLaw and I have caved to the fad of blogging. I suppose the place to being will be a brief introduction of myself and the intent of this blog.

I am 25 year old attorney in the Tampa Bay area. My specialty is workers' compensation insurance defense, also known as separating the facts from fraud in workplace accidents. It's a niche field and has perks such as our own set of administrative rules, essentially rendering my Civ Pro class useless. Additionally, we have the annual FWCI conference, which is a glorious weekend of schmoozing and B list celebrity appearances. Plus I work in the most awesome little office on an island with the most incredible staff. I couldn't have asked for a better place to be a year and a half out of law school and I'm not going anywhere anytime soon.

I live in a sweet little apartment with my phenomenal significant other of just under 2 years now, who recently took the Bar exam and is in the process of becoming a lawberdasher himself, although his field of interest is more mainstrem, involving criminal law and civil insurance disputes. We have a spoiled rotten purebred bengal cat, Princess Leia, who resides with us as well. It's a nice situation and I'm pleased to be a part of it.

The handle OohLawLaw does a good job exemplifying what is 'me.' I've been described as being 'over the top.' I am in love with anything that sparkles and shines. I have no qualms about wearing a shimmery, fuschia suit to Court and have purses and shoes that would make Liberace jealous. It's come to be expected of me and I do not disappoint.

As to the intentions in creating this blog, I'm not quite settled. I suppose some degree my future posts will involve stories of my life and work - of course, carefully avoiding any HIPAA or Professional Conduct violations. Other posts may contain commentary about my legal opinion on various newsworthy (or not) issues, or harkbacks to my legal education and professional involvment. And then others will likely contain non-legal rants or raves, related to my other interests and activities. We'll see where it goes from here.

So, please be seated. It should be a good show.